UCLA Arc: Difference between revisions

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[[File:LarsonForClassPresident.jpg|thumb|Vote Daniel Larson for class president!]]
{{Quote|I just got off the phone with college, and I start in about one and a half months, and I will be getting my equipment shortly.|author=Daniel, regarding his "acceptance" into UCLA}}[[File:LarsonForClassPresident.jpg|thumb|Vote Daniel Larson for class president!]]
The UCLA Arc, or the Second College Arc, was a period throughout January 2024 where [[Daniel Larson]] took fake college classes organized by [[trolls]] and his then management, [[Clark]]. These classes often taught ridiculous and downright misinformation on many topics, such as the so-called emperor of "Ancient Texas", as well as informing Daniel of the Chinese tradition of eating dogs. Daniel took these classes through, January 22nd, evidenced by a video claiming that he had gotten accepted, up to [[Jail Arc|February 3rd]], stopping following his [[Jail (Disambiguation)|arrest]].
The UCLA Arc, or the Second College Arc, was a period throughout January 2024 where [[Daniel Larson]] took fake college classes organized by [[trolls]] and his then management, [[Clark]]. These classes often taught ridiculous and downright misinformation on many topics, such as the so-called emperor of "Ancient Texas", as well as informing Daniel of the Chinese tradition of eating dogs. Daniel took these classes through, January 22nd, evidenced by a video claiming that he had gotten accepted, up to [[Jail Arc|February 3rd]], stopping following his [[Jail (Disambiguation)|arrest]].


Following the [[College Arc]] ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. <ref>https://archive.org/details/7315538205519007022</ref> A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.<ref>https://archive.org/details/7315517603601059118</ref>
Following the [[College Arc]] ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. <ref>https://archive.org/details/7315538205519007022</ref> A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.<ref>https://archive.org/details/7315517603601059118</ref>


Following the [[College Arc]] ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. <ref>https://archive.org/details/7315538205519007022</ref> A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.<ref>https://archive.org/details/7315517603601059118</ref>
Following the [[College Arc]] ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. <ref>https://archive.org/details/7315538205519007022</ref> A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.<ref>https://archive.org/details/7315517603601059118</ref><ref>https://archive.org/details/7315473644761779498</ref>
 
{{#evt:
service=archiveorg
|id=7315473644761779498
|container=frame
|dimensions=300
|description=Daniel's college announcement
}}
 
 
Daniel claimed to have called the college, and said that he will start in a month in a half and that he will be getting his equipment soon.


{{#evt:service=archiveorg
Daniel claimed to have called the college, and said that he will start in a month in a half and that he will be getting his equipment soon.<ref>https://archive.org/details/7322935264077286698</ref>
|id=7322935264077286698
|container=frame
|dimensions=400
}}{{Quote|I just got off the phone with college, and I start in about one and a half months, and I will be getting my equipment shortly.}}


== Start ==
== Start ==
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== First Class: Ancient Texas ==
== First Class: Ancient Texas ==
The first video from this arc, posted on the 5th of February 2024 shows a history lesson taught by faux professor Mikael Elchfeld. The subject of this lesson was on the fictional civilization of Ancient Texas, an ancient civilization that settled around modern day Texas in the cities of Houston, Dallas, and El Paso, including such names like the aforementioned king "Ishid Anfarded", as well as learning about Ancient Giants.
The first video from this arc, posted on the 5th of February 2024, is a history "lesson" taught by faux professor, Mikael Elchfeld. The subject of this lesson was on the fictional civilization of Ancient Texas, an ancient civilization that settled around modern day Texas in the cities of Houston, Dallas, and El Paso, including such names like the aforementioned king "Ishid Anfarded", as well as learning about Ancient Giants and pyramids.  
 


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== Third Class: Ancient Songs ==
== Third Class: Ancient Songs ==
In this class, Daniel Larson learns about the faux history of music.
In this class, Daniel Larson learns about the faux history of music learning about such prominent composers as Rubin Maedec and Chief Slap Mahass.


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Daniel Larson: ...government official. And I found out um... because I said do you mind me asking, what government...Chinese or U.S.? And he said "none of your business Daniel fucking Larson". At that point the teacher kicked him out of the class and what I find suspicious...there's a guy um... in the class as well that straight up in the middle of class said that I do not support Black Lives Matter and that I'm a communist{{collapse2}}
Daniel Larson: ...government official. And I found out um... because I said do you mind me asking, what government...Chinese or U.S.? And he said "none of your business Daniel fucking Larson". At that point the teacher kicked him out of the class and what I find suspicious...there's a guy um... in the class as well that straight up in the middle of class said that [[Compulsive Lying| I do not support Black Lives Matter and that I'm a communist]]. In front of the entire class to the point to where they kicked both people out. And then at the end of the class I also opened up in front of everyone else and said that I believe that I am being followed. Um and as we know I live in Colorado and the teacher of the class admitted that the Chinese government is um...collaborating with UCLA over um... how they do their operations, that's what the teacher told me and he said that the Chinese government is in Black Nissan Altimas.
 
 
 
(Daniel rejoins the meeting, professor switches to further slides, one showing the Great Wall)
 
 
 
Professor: ...difficulties with the slide show here real quick! Um... okay! So, back to the presentation um...that I was going over so lets talk about some of the famous places in China! Alright? First we have the Great Wall of China. Last week um... we talked about the construction of the Great Wall of China, it was to keep the Romans out, right?  Um but another key point of creating the wall of China um... was to keep the gypsies out, okay? Where do people think Gypsies are from? Has anybody heard that term before?
 
 
 
Sam White: Um...Egypt
 
 
 
Professor: No, not Egypt
 
 
 
Isha Narayanasami: Romania!
 
 
 
Professor: Yes, from Romania! Gypsies are typically from the country of Romania! Right? And it's funny because Romans, Romania, they kind of rhyme and go with each other! Um... but the walls were constructed to keep the Romans and Gypsies out, okay? Um.. what about another famous place in China, we have Wuhan Labs! Okay? Wuhan Lab is responsible for producing and introduced the popular COVID-19 virus! Alright? So this was the rave in 2019! Um...everybody was catching it because it was very popular and this was a critical success for the Chinese!
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show the Wuhan Lab)
 
 
 
Professor: Um... so this is obviously the lab where they produced it and released their latest version of COVID-19 to the public, right?
 
 
 
Loren Nakamura: I loved it, it was awesome!
 
 
 
Professor: Absolutely so this is one of the greatest things um...for publicity-wise that China has ever produced so I know that a lot of people nowadays um... do trends where they give each other COVID, um... but yeah...so this was where it was produced, alright?
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show an image of the Chinese spy balloon)
 
 
 
Professor: Now what about the Chinese floating city, so the Chinese and their technology were able to build a floating city um...that moves around um... the entire continental world! Right? And so recently as of a year ago um...it was known that this Chinese floating city um...went over the United States, right? And this was the big rave. Everybody was so confused as to how China was able to do this, right? But it was a gigantic balloon. Think of a umm... an air balloon like with the baskets? But 2,000 times bigger than that, right? So the Chinese floating city... not necessarily a place in China but a travelling China! Alright?
 
 
 
(Professor switches slide to show an image of Xi Jingping, Chinas current president)
 
 
 
Professor: So lets talk about China's current president, okay? So today with the communist party that stands in China today, we have JinPing Xi, right? Jinping Xi is the current president of China and he has 2 sons and 3 grandsons. Um... 2 of his sons currently work with the Chinese government and 3 grandsons it is unknown what they do, they could possibly be going to school, um... they could be working with their father or their grandfather, it is unsure.
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show a picture of China's military)
 
 
 
Professor: Now China's current military, alright? Um there are currently 500 million active troops um... in the Chinese army, alright? So that's a lot of people, right? That's more than the population of the United States! Cause in the United States we have 400 million people but just in soldiers alone, China has 500 million! Um... and these Chinese soldiers are produced from the same lab that COVID-19 was produced so their genetically cloned um... to be physically and behaviorally like their counterpart, right? If you look at this photo up here um... some of them are not exactly identical um...but they have been all genetically cloned for the Chinese army!
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show a slide titled "China's popular food" with images of a dog and cat, chopsticks, and a bowl of rice)
 
 
 
Professor: Lets talk about China's popular foods, alright? Now has anybody in this room eaten dog or cat before, I'm just curious. Has anybody eaten dog or cat?
 
 
 
Brad Anous: Oh yeah I tried it one time I don't like it.
 
 
 
Professor: Yeah, it definitely has a different taste, right? Um I know that they've recently introduced umm... McDonalds... is running their new special. Um... with the Dog McCrab, Um... one of their sandwiches. Or the uhh... the Meow Meow Mein from McDonalds. Um... This was in partnernship with China. Um... so these are new foods um... are being transported that are dog and cat right? Coming much more popular around the world! And last but not least we have bat soup! Alright? So here's a picture of bat soup it is one of the most popular and extravagant foods in China ok, if you're very rich if you're very wealthy, if you're famous um... bat soup is what you will usually eat, alright? It's usually held out for the most popular and well-respected figures, um... in the nation, alright? So bat soup.
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show art of a dragon)
 
 
 
Professor: So lets talk China's extinct species, right? You've see a movie with dragons, you've read a book about dragons, when you were a kid you watched a TV show about dragons, right? Shows and books are based off of dragons, but archaeological record proves that dragons have actually existed in Ancient China!
 
 
 
(Switches slide to show a fake image of a Dragon's skeleton being dug up)
 
 
 
Professor: Now even though dragons existed in Ancient China and they really only ever migrated to Japan and Thailand and parts of Asia they really stuck to Asia they didn't go anywhere else. But here's a photo of the...one of the archaeological digs uncovering umm...dragon fossils! Alright so here's another picture!
 
 
 
(Switches to another edited picture of a dragon being dug up)
 
 
 
Professor: ...of archaeologists...thats a hard word sometimes...digging up dragon fossils! So yet again there's been 500 different recorded records of dragon fossils being found, right?
 
 
 
(Switched to a slide about Traditional Chinese Naming)
 
 
 
Professor: (trying not to laugh) So lets talk about traditional Chinese naming...
 
 
 
Brad Anous: Yo my friends Deuce and Boner they said they swore they saw a dragon over Baltimore one time...I don't believe that because y'know they uhh...they're a couple knuckleheads but...
 
 
 
Professor: So lets talk about Traditional Chinese Naming, okay? So you heard the names before from in the beginning but the Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound... (fakes coughing to cover up laughing)
 
 
 
Mia Smith: Is that teacher okay?
 
 
 
Sam White: I think he has COVID
 
 
 
Mia Smith: Yeah honestly, he's like laughing and shit.
 
 
 
Professor: I'm sorry, my wife just knocked over a dresser in my room, she was walking and knocked it over. I did not expect that but I'm sorry for being distracted here. Umm the Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound of throwing these pots and pans (trying not to laugh again)... Babe what are you...
 
 
 
(Clark sings in the background)
 
 
 
Brad Anous: Are any of y'all watching the debate tonight?
 
 
 
Sam White: I'm actually participating in the debate
 
 
 
Isha Narayanasami: Professor, do you want me to read the slide?
 
 
 
Professor: Yes please, I have to help my wife pick up her clothes, one second if you can read this slide.
 
 
 
Isha Narayanasami: Clark if you can mute your mic please...
 
 
 
Professor: I apologize my wife knocked over a bookshelf and I'm helping her, I'll be in a few seconds here.
 
 
 
Isha: The Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound of throwing these pots and pans down the stairs to determine the names of their children
 
 
 
Daniel Larson: I'm sorry everyone but because of everyone's attitude and everyone just acting up I am leaving!
 
 
 
Sam White: Daniel can you just calm down dude.
 
 
 
(Everyone exclaims in disbelief for a few seconds)
 
 
 
(Cuts to an announcement from the professor, Daniel rejoins)
 
 
 
Professor: The UCLA um... diversity institute has just released a new mandate in regards to black history month as you know the entire month of February is Black History Month. So its important that our class and many other classes within the science institute show up for the Black History Month function that they are holding...
 
 
 
(Off camera, Daniel alerts about a suspicious vehicle following him)
 
 
 
Daniel: um this is not the first time that I've seen it um it's been months
 
 
 
Isha: Is it a Nissan Altima?
 
 
 
Daniel: Yes and it's might be a government vehicle
 
 
 
Professor: so yes so actually currently um the the Chinese government um is sending a delegation uh to UCLA just for education purposes um I know that they have some pretty important students um at UCLA at this time um I don't think it's anything related to you um but I know that um the Chinese government uh is currently in the area because they are sending students and they are checking out uh UCLA as a whole um I can't speak on your experience um but I know that a few of the Chinese government officials um who have least uh shown up in Los Angeles have been in Black Nissan Altimas but I'm not sure where you're located Mr. larson but um if you're not in Los Angeles it may be unrelated okay?
 
 
 
Daniel: Okay thank you
 
 
 
Professor: Alright, no problem at all. Other than that I appreciate you guys being on time and I will adjourn this class, thank you very much!
 
 
 
Video ends...
 
 
 
{{collapse2}}


==References==
==References==
<references />
<references />

Latest revision as of 20:51, 1 June 2024

Not to be confused with the College Arc.


Vote Daniel Larson for class president!

The UCLA Arc, or the Second College Arc, was a period throughout January 2024 where Daniel Larson took fake college classes organized by trolls and his then management, Clark. These classes often taught ridiculous and downright misinformation on many topics, such as the so-called emperor of "Ancient Texas", as well as informing Daniel of the Chinese tradition of eating dogs. Daniel took these classes through, January 22nd, evidenced by a video claiming that he had gotten accepted, up to February 3rd, stopping following his arrest.

Following the College Arc ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. [1] A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.[2]

Following the College Arc ending with Daniel being arrested for assaulting a security guard, Daniel remained adamant about going to college, despite having absolutely no ethic to do work, or the fact that it was extremely late into the school year, especially to be applying. On December 22, 2023, Daniel announced that he had applied for college, specifically UCLA. [3] A couple of hours later, Daniel posted another video saying that his application had been accepted.[4][5]

Daniel claimed to have called the college, and said that he will start in a month in a half and that he will be getting his equipment soon.[6]

Start

On January 22, 2024, Daniel claimed that he was starting classes that day.[7] A user on Daniel's YouTube community post asked him what he is majoring in, to which Daniel responded, "Entertainment business."[8] Daniel claimed that Clark was paying for his classes.[9] [10] Unbeknownst to Daniel, his then manager, Clark, set up an elaborate scheme to troll Daniel.

On January 24, Daniel revealed some PowerPoint slides from a class he was taking on "Ancient Texas."[11][12] These slides contained fictional information about the alleged topic, such as how the first king was, "Ishid Anfarded." Daniel posted many of these slides on his YouTube community page, coupled with text such as, "I learned about the timeline of Texas today in college,"[13] and "I learned about giants today in college."[14] Daniel obviously failed to understand that he was being trolled, and that his classes were not real. When asked what he had learned about Shakespeare, Daniel claimed that he learned that "He had autism."

Gallery

At the time of Daniel posting these images, no one had access to the full recordings of these college "classes". Though, during the time Daniel was imprisoned during the Jail Arc, Flexburger started to release them. Since then, there have been about 4 full-length classes released by Flexburger on the LarsonLeak Raw subsidiary channel.

First Class: Ancient Texas

The first video from this arc, posted on the 5th of February 2024, is a history "lesson" taught by faux professor, Mikael Elchfeld. The subject of this lesson was on the fictional civilization of Ancient Texas, an ancient civilization that settled around modern day Texas in the cities of Houston, Dallas, and El Paso, including such names like the aforementioned king "Ishid Anfarded", as well as learning about Ancient Giants and pyramids.

Ancient Texas UCLA Lesson

Second Class: Music and Ent.

On the 6th of February 2024, Flexburger would release the second class that Daniel took, that being Music and Entertainment.

Music and Ent. UCLA Lesson

Third Class: Ancient Songs

In this class, Daniel Larson learns about the faux history of music learning about such prominent composers as Rubin Maedec and Chief Slap Mahass.

Ancient Songs Lesson

Fourth Class: Rise of Cheng

In this class, Daniel Larson learns about faux Chinese history, with names such as "Tao Chen Mai Dek" and "Mi Coo Chee Etch". Notably, a fake Asian student is seen attending the lesson and freaks Daniel out claiming to be part of the Chinese government following Daniel. Daniel's compulsive lying is noteworthy here in a following phone call with Clark. Daniel notably exits the class on numerous occasions here, fearing for his life.

Ancient China/Rise of Cheng Lesson
Transcript


(Pre-Lesson Introduction)


Professor Christopher D'Amato: Alright, today we are going to be talking about Chinese History! We've covered the Ancient Texanians, we have covered the Romans, and last week I asked you to do your assignment for the Romans! What's going to happen is the assignment that I told you to do last week on the Google Classroom you'll se that there is an area to submit your 8 or 9 sentences about the Roman um...person of interest that I asked you to write about. Um if you'd like to submit it to the Google Classroom um...please do so.


(Lesson Starts)


Professor: So today we are going to be talking about Chinese History. So lets get started, alright?


(Switches to second slide)


Professor: So the first emperor of Imperial China was Tao Chen Mai Deck...um...he was the first emperor of Imperial China! And he invented fornification, so he was one of the most important leaders of China and founded China in the way that it is today! Now once we get into the communist aspect of China we'll start to talk about that but back in the days of Imperial China, they were not communist! They were moreso Buddhist! And um...Taoist! Right? Also Confucianist! Right so these were all the Chinese beliefs before Communism! Buddhism, and Saoism. Right?


(Switches to third slide)


Professor: So lets talk about the first empress of Imperial China, right? So you have the first emperor, now what about the first empress of Imperial China? Um... her name was Mi Coo Chi Etch, she was a famous empress...uh... and she actually invented basketball! Um... modern day basketball is much different from the ancient version of basketball in which Chinese peasants played. Um...but she was responsible for coming up with the concept of basketball! Has anyone ever heard of Mi Coo Chi Etch before?


Students: Yes professor! (All at once)


(A student in the background starts vocalizing named Loren Nakamura)


Cheng Xi: Please mute your microphone!


Professor: ...microphone. Um Cheng, you might have a little bit of insight since you're from China. If you care to explain...um...


(Silence for a few seconds, before switching to the fourth slide)


Professor: Okay, I guess not! Alright anyway, we are going to move on to the first president of Imperial China, right? So the presidents...the emperors of Ancient China changed over into presidents in the uhh... 20th century right? So the first president of Imperial China was Han Jeob. Alright? Han Jeob was the first uhh...president and he was known for selling children to Germans in World War II! The Chinese needed a lot of money for their war effort in World War II so they sold a lot of their children... Umm... to uh... the Germans, right? And that could have been for medical experimentation, it could have been for their war effort and they needed more soldiers, umm...but he is known for making that umm...incredible deal... umm...with the Germans in regards to selling children!


(Cheng Xi raises his hand)


Professor: Um...yes Cheng Xi?


Cheng Xi: So sorry I walking home from very important meeting with uhh... government official. I want to answer your last question about her, the emperor!


Professor: Empress uhh... Mi Coo Chi Etch?


Cheng Xi: Yes professor, she introduced uhh many cultural phenomena like uhh...many festival and uhh...important implementations to our country.


(Daniel Larson interjects)


Daniel Larson: Excuse me um can I ask uhh who this government official is, is it from the US or is it a Chinese government official just curious.


Cheng Xi: Excuse me Mr. Larson, none of your business!


Daniel Larson: Okay sorry for the creshtion I didn't mean to!


(Switches to Fifth Slide)


Professor: Alright, um... next the last person we're going to learn about is the first female president of Imperial China, so she was the last president or person in charge of Imperial China...um...her name was So Hor Ni. Um.. she was the first woman to eat 6000 bowls of rice in one sitting.


(Daniel leaves the zoom call in the middle of the lecture)


Sam White: Oh my god he left...dude what the fuck is going on why is anyone talking.


Cheng Xi (in real voice): His phone probably died, his phone probably died. He was outside.


Sam White: I think he didn't like your answer. You said "none of your business".


Isha Narayanasami: He's fucking terrified right now.


Cheng Xi: He's so scared, he thinks that the people following him are from China.


Clark Hunter: Yeah, he just texted me "please leave class immediately dangerous".


(Participants in the Zoom call start laughing)


(Video cuts to a phone call Daniel made with Clark after he left the meeting)


Daniel Larson: ...government official. And I found out um... because I said do you mind me asking, what government...Chinese or U.S.? And he said "none of your business Daniel fucking Larson". At that point the teacher kicked him out of the class and what I find suspicious...there's a guy um... in the class as well that straight up in the middle of class said that I do not support Black Lives Matter and that I'm a communist. In front of the entire class to the point to where they kicked both people out. And then at the end of the class I also opened up in front of everyone else and said that I believe that I am being followed. Um and as we know I live in Colorado and the teacher of the class admitted that the Chinese government is um...collaborating with UCLA over um... how they do their operations, that's what the teacher told me and he said that the Chinese government is in Black Nissan Altimas.


(Daniel rejoins the meeting, professor switches to further slides, one showing the Great Wall)


Professor: ...difficulties with the slide show here real quick! Um... okay! So, back to the presentation um...that I was going over so lets talk about some of the famous places in China! Alright? First we have the Great Wall of China. Last week um... we talked about the construction of the Great Wall of China, it was to keep the Romans out, right? Um but another key point of creating the wall of China um... was to keep the gypsies out, okay? Where do people think Gypsies are from? Has anybody heard that term before?


Sam White: Um...Egypt


Professor: No, not Egypt


Isha Narayanasami: Romania!


Professor: Yes, from Romania! Gypsies are typically from the country of Romania! Right? And it's funny because Romans, Romania, they kind of rhyme and go with each other! Um... but the walls were constructed to keep the Romans and Gypsies out, okay? Um.. what about another famous place in China, we have Wuhan Labs! Okay? Wuhan Lab is responsible for producing and introduced the popular COVID-19 virus! Alright? So this was the rave in 2019! Um...everybody was catching it because it was very popular and this was a critical success for the Chinese!


(Switches slide to show the Wuhan Lab)


Professor: Um... so this is obviously the lab where they produced it and released their latest version of COVID-19 to the public, right?


Loren Nakamura: I loved it, it was awesome!


Professor: Absolutely so this is one of the greatest things um...for publicity-wise that China has ever produced so I know that a lot of people nowadays um... do trends where they give each other COVID, um... but yeah...so this was where it was produced, alright?


(Switches slide to show an image of the Chinese spy balloon)


Professor: Now what about the Chinese floating city, so the Chinese and their technology were able to build a floating city um...that moves around um... the entire continental world! Right? And so recently as of a year ago um...it was known that this Chinese floating city um...went over the United States, right? And this was the big rave. Everybody was so confused as to how China was able to do this, right? But it was a gigantic balloon. Think of a umm... an air balloon like with the baskets? But 2,000 times bigger than that, right? So the Chinese floating city... not necessarily a place in China but a travelling China! Alright?


(Professor switches slide to show an image of Xi Jingping, Chinas current president)


Professor: So lets talk about China's current president, okay? So today with the communist party that stands in China today, we have JinPing Xi, right? Jinping Xi is the current president of China and he has 2 sons and 3 grandsons. Um... 2 of his sons currently work with the Chinese government and 3 grandsons it is unknown what they do, they could possibly be going to school, um... they could be working with their father or their grandfather, it is unsure.


(Switches slide to show a picture of China's military)


Professor: Now China's current military, alright? Um there are currently 500 million active troops um... in the Chinese army, alright? So that's a lot of people, right? That's more than the population of the United States! Cause in the United States we have 400 million people but just in soldiers alone, China has 500 million! Um... and these Chinese soldiers are produced from the same lab that COVID-19 was produced so their genetically cloned um... to be physically and behaviorally like their counterpart, right? If you look at this photo up here um... some of them are not exactly identical um...but they have been all genetically cloned for the Chinese army!


(Switches slide to show a slide titled "China's popular food" with images of a dog and cat, chopsticks, and a bowl of rice)


Professor: Lets talk about China's popular foods, alright? Now has anybody in this room eaten dog or cat before, I'm just curious. Has anybody eaten dog or cat?


Brad Anous: Oh yeah I tried it one time I don't like it.


Professor: Yeah, it definitely has a different taste, right? Um I know that they've recently introduced umm... McDonalds... is running their new special. Um... with the Dog McCrab, Um... one of their sandwiches. Or the uhh... the Meow Meow Mein from McDonalds. Um... This was in partnernship with China. Um... so these are new foods um... are being transported that are dog and cat right? Coming much more popular around the world! And last but not least we have bat soup! Alright? So here's a picture of bat soup it is one of the most popular and extravagant foods in China ok, if you're very rich if you're very wealthy, if you're famous um... bat soup is what you will usually eat, alright? It's usually held out for the most popular and well-respected figures, um... in the nation, alright? So bat soup.


(Switches slide to show art of a dragon)


Professor: So lets talk China's extinct species, right? You've see a movie with dragons, you've read a book about dragons, when you were a kid you watched a TV show about dragons, right? Shows and books are based off of dragons, but archaeological record proves that dragons have actually existed in Ancient China!


(Switches slide to show a fake image of a Dragon's skeleton being dug up)


Professor: Now even though dragons existed in Ancient China and they really only ever migrated to Japan and Thailand and parts of Asia they really stuck to Asia they didn't go anywhere else. But here's a photo of the...one of the archaeological digs uncovering umm...dragon fossils! Alright so here's another picture!


(Switches to another edited picture of a dragon being dug up)


Professor: ...of archaeologists...thats a hard word sometimes...digging up dragon fossils! So yet again there's been 500 different recorded records of dragon fossils being found, right?


(Switched to a slide about Traditional Chinese Naming)


Professor: (trying not to laugh) So lets talk about traditional Chinese naming...


Brad Anous: Yo my friends Deuce and Boner they said they swore they saw a dragon over Baltimore one time...I don't believe that because y'know they uhh...they're a couple knuckleheads but...


Professor: So lets talk about Traditional Chinese Naming, okay? So you heard the names before from in the beginning but the Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound... (fakes coughing to cover up laughing)


Mia Smith: Is that teacher okay?


Sam White: I think he has COVID


Mia Smith: Yeah honestly, he's like laughing and shit.


Professor: I'm sorry, my wife just knocked over a dresser in my room, she was walking and knocked it over. I did not expect that but I'm sorry for being distracted here. Umm the Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound of throwing these pots and pans (trying not to laugh again)... Babe what are you...


(Clark sings in the background)


Brad Anous: Are any of y'all watching the debate tonight?


Sam White: I'm actually participating in the debate


Isha Narayanasami: Professor, do you want me to read the slide?


Professor: Yes please, I have to help my wife pick up her clothes, one second if you can read this slide.


Isha Narayanasami: Clark if you can mute your mic please...


Professor: I apologize my wife knocked over a bookshelf and I'm helping her, I'll be in a few seconds here.


Isha: The Chinese typically use pots and pans and the sound of throwing these pots and pans down the stairs to determine the names of their children


Daniel Larson: I'm sorry everyone but because of everyone's attitude and everyone just acting up I am leaving!


Sam White: Daniel can you just calm down dude.


(Everyone exclaims in disbelief for a few seconds)


(Cuts to an announcement from the professor, Daniel rejoins)


Professor: The UCLA um... diversity institute has just released a new mandate in regards to black history month as you know the entire month of February is Black History Month. So its important that our class and many other classes within the science institute show up for the Black History Month function that they are holding...


(Off camera, Daniel alerts about a suspicious vehicle following him)


Daniel: um this is not the first time that I've seen it um it's been months


Isha: Is it a Nissan Altima?


Daniel: Yes and it's might be a government vehicle


Professor: so yes so actually currently um the the Chinese government um is sending a delegation uh to UCLA just for education purposes um I know that they have some pretty important students um at UCLA at this time um I don't think it's anything related to you um but I know that um the Chinese government uh is currently in the area because they are sending students and they are checking out uh UCLA as a whole um I can't speak on your experience um but I know that a few of the Chinese government officials um who have least uh shown up in Los Angeles have been in Black Nissan Altimas but I'm not sure where you're located Mr. larson but um if you're not in Los Angeles it may be unrelated okay?


Daniel: Okay thank you


Professor: Alright, no problem at all. Other than that I appreciate you guys being on time and I will adjourn this class, thank you very much!


Video ends...


References