Goldberg Shacklestein

"The Happy Merchant," a racist caricature of a Jewish person, nicknamed Goldberg Shekelstein (mispronounced as "Shacklestein" by Daniel)

Goldberg Shacklestein (also known as The Happy Merchant) is the FICTIONAL "leader of the Jews" and FICTIONAL leader of the New World Order. It ███ █ ██████ ██████████ THAT WAS MADE BY PEOPLE WHO ONLY WANT TO SPREAD HATE, YOU WILL NOT RESEARCH FURTHER GOYS.

Who is Shacklestein?

Goldberg Shacklestein is █ █████████ ██████ ███ ████ ███ ████, represented by the hate symbol "The Happy Merchant", an antisemitic meme depicting a man with hyperbolized stereotypical Jewish facial features who is rubbing his hands together.

The meme was created by an artist using the pseudonym "██ █████ ████", who eventually was exposed as being the notorious EVIL white supremacist, EVIL illustrator, and EVIL filmmaker ████ ██████.

Association with the Alt-Right

Typically, the caricature of "Goldberg Shekelstein" has been used on the less mainstream parts of the internet by Neo-Nazis and the Alt-Right to propagate hate towards Jewish Americans, and Jews in general.

Daniel's concerns about Shackelstein (which aren't true btw)

• Trying to ██████ him along with the █████ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qwFQd3v5qJA)
• Possibly (through associations with the New World Order) assisting Jonas in collecting his and Samantha's █████ (REDACTED LINK)

Associations & "Criminal History"

Daniel has accused Shacklestein of a plethora of crimes, including attempting, commissioning, committing [REDACTED], [REDACTED], collaboration with ███ █████ and political corruption.

Kidnapping

Daniel accused Shacklestein of pairing up with and collaborating with the ███ ████ █████, ███ Jews, █████, and a man named ████ to ██████ Daniel. Daniel claims to not be afraid of them, despite having made videos pleading for them to back off.

New World Order

Daniel has accused Shacklestein of being the leader of the Jews and the New World Order, with the common goal of ██████████ him.

The New World Order is a FALSE conspiracy theory that a totalitarian shadow government controlled by the elites, the Jews, and the elite Jews has complete control over every world government, and ████ ██████ ███ ████ ██ ██████ ██████████ ████ ████. This theory is not very substantial and does not have solid supporting evidence AND YOU WILL NOT RESEARCH FURTHER GOYIM!!!

Jonas

Jonas, a former caretaker for Daniel whom Daniel assaulted, has been accused by Daniel of cooperating with the New World Order and secretly pulling strings from the background.

(REDACTED LINK)

WARNING:

ANY NON-AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ACCESSING THIS FILE WILL BE IMMEDIATELY TERMINATED THROUGH JEWISH MEMETIC KILL AGENT. SCROLLING DOWN WITHOUT PROPER MEMETIC INOCULATION WILL RESULT IN IMMEDIATE CARDIAC ARREST FOLLOWED BY DEATH.

YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

MEMETIC KILL AGENT ACTIVATED

CONTINUED LIFE SIGNS CONFIRMED

REMOVING SAFETY INTERLOCKS

Welcome, authorized personnel.

Greetings. 

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Special Chronology Procedures

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Presidential motorcade directly prior to Incident-001-Γ.

Incident-001-Γ's definitive, canonical timeline is recorded on solid state databases. Two copies exist, one is located within a secured headquarters and the location of the other is known to the Overseers. "Red Right Hand” has successfully seized all documentation of Incident-001-Γ which are not currently available to any public. Current theory is that as a result of SCP-001's effect, there exists no possibility for any trespassing within SCP-001's continuity via distortion of time and/or dimensional space.

Quality of life health insurance plans and any extraordinary medical expenses1 are to be provided to the witnesses of Incident-001-Γ.

Massive publicizing and public re-affirmation of established perspectives on Incident-001-Γ are to be disseminated through both reputable and alternative news sources in order to blunt the spread of uncontrolled manufactured information. Marketing and production front companies are to fund independent media outlets creating, distributing, and selling advertising space on media catering to narrow niches of alternative perspectives which are rooted to or branched off of an Incident-001-Γ perspective variant.

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Description

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SCP-001 is the projectile which killed U.S. President John F. Kennedy, fired by an unidentifiable number of assailants acting simultaneously as part of one or more conspiracies. Upon impact, human perception began falling out of sync with objective reality at an individual level.

The events surrounding SCP-001's trajectory are designated as Incident-001-Γ.

Although the divergent standards of objectivity are largely compatible enough to allow for human society to function, that does not mean they are not a threat to the long-term viability of human civilization and intelligent life as a whole. It is possible that the current formation of reality exists as a result of a VK-Class reality restructuring scenario.

Possible documentation of lone individual present during Incident-001-Γ.

Individuals with living memory of Incident-001-Γ are the last population of humanity able to agree on any shared concept of truth, their shared experience in seeing or hearing about Incident-001-Γ. The percentage of still-living eyewitnesses negatively correlates to the density of unnatural potential energy manifesting in the observable universe as anomalous phenomenon.

Their collective memory provides a consistent base of widely, but not universally, held truths. This in turn stabilizes the increasingly individualized SCP-001 perspectives, as it is the last living shared

certain truth among Earth's population.

Witnesses who do not otherwise provide valued testimony and who have robust physiques may volunteer for experimental and indefinite life-extending experiments, in order to preserve the stabilizing effect their memory provides for as long as the human body can allow.

A statistically significant minority of witness testimony report variations on so-called "Badge Man" even taking into account inflation caused by civilians seeing unfamiliar Secret Service and other security forces. The only conclusively proven participants in Incident-001-Γ are John Kennedy and Lee Oswald, although they did not have any prior contact. Other individuals have been named or described often enough to be viewed as persons of interest.

On New-Fashioned Bilateral Universality

Collected testimony and evidence for Incident-001-Γ and SCP-001

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_{Written By}

Truth & Facts Committee

_{In Association With}

Historical Relevance Committee, Anti-Revisionist Task Force Preamble: As the increased veiling segmentation of the sheep has produced a confusing number of potential perspectives for personnel to be prepared for, a conclusive report on the development of more branching worldviews and how they may conflict with each other in order to properly prevent badsight is the accurate and correct way to maintain veiltruth. Interpersonal arguments are not considered to be infringing on the sanctity of veiltruth at this time as collated through this documentation.

S. I - Summary of Events & Suspects

On 11/22/1963, at 12:30 p.m, Lee Oswald fired two bullets from the sixth floor of the Texas Schoolbook Depository. Oswald's first shot missed, striking a concrete curb. The second shot mortally wounded the President and injured the Governor. A third shot (SCP-001) lethally vaporized U.S. President Kennedy's cranial cavity.

For the approximate decade between Incident-001-Γ and the ascension of President Gerald Ford, SCP-001's effect was widespread but largely benign. The disparity between perception and reality was growing, but gradually and in a linear fashion. The fractalization did not begin to occur until the failed attempt to assassinate President Ford on September 5, 1975 by Lynn "Squeaky" Fromme.

38th U.S. President Gerald Ford exactly 11 years and 10 months after Incident-001-Γ.

In both crowds, all witnesses reported seeing differing versions of the events, most of which did not have President Ford surviving. Two weeks later, Sara Jane Moore made a subsequent attempt on Ford's life in order to reconcile her knowledge of his death with his visible living person. The exponential spread of SCP-001's effect can be demonstrated by Gerald Ford's sincere belief from at least 1976 until his death that the Soviet Union had withdrawn from eastern Europe during the Nixon administration.

Alleged photograph documenting the 'Badge Man'.

Historical documents reflecting the official story are to suggest that it was the scandal which caused the proliferation of distorted information throughout society, and not the survival of President Ford.

Any scenario, whether there exists witness testimony or not, could be true given the ephemeral nature of truth and falsehood on a conceptual level.

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Suspect & Witness Testimony

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Police Log - Babushka Lady

Umbrella Man Tape

Secretary Reedy Tape

Police Record: Jack Ruby

Translated KGB Debriefing

Police Record: Lee Oswald

Deathbed Confession -George Warren Hickey Jr.

Deathbed Confession - Castro

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S. II - Individual-Aggregate Level Veil Effect

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The most common effect of SCP-001 is frustration. The belief that one is skilled, but unable to get a job, or that they are wonderful people yet nobody seems to like them. Unable to understand that they are being paid less than they think they are. Feeling cramped and confined even if they see themselves living in a big house all to themselves.

Wrongness is there, it can be felt, but it cannot be explained. It manifests in psychological disorders such as Imposter Syndrome. At a certain level, they know that they don't belong. One more way to feel the lonesomeness of SCP-001.

Those with less self-awareness may be promoted via the Dilbert Principle, that incompetent individuals will be promoted until they can no longer do damage. This is a natural organizational self-defense measure as the structure is aware something is wrong, even if none of the participants themselves are able to.

The so-called "Mandela Effect" arises when the degree to which any given person is out of sync with reality drifts further in their living memory, so that what was true to them once is no longer so. However, this is easily rationalized and is not considered to be damaging except in rare cases.

Analysis of social movements derived from SCP-001 was at first limited to immediate interpretation of the Kennedy Assassination, but following disruption of the assassination attempt on Gerald Ford and the subsequent lack of new renewals of blood, the fracturing of collective truth has continued on its path to disintegration.

Mannlicher–Carcano allegedly owned and used by Lee Oswald

When a critical mass of knowledge an individual is able to interpret as factual have no connection to reality as defined by physical laws and natural forces, it will frequently cause them to disconnect most of their familial and social relationships. This withdrawal is usually a result of frustration and confusion. They may begin to make new social connections in small networks of those who find that their alternative viewpoints overlap on at least some measures.

Even in these extreme cases, this does not prevent those with heavily altered viewpoints from carrying out the functions which have become routine. This is more a result of muscle memory, as their will to engage with the wider world is totally broken by their SCP-001 experience.

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Conclusions:

There is no purpose on speculating who killed President Kennedy. Every guess is correct to someone.

Nobody can see the world the same way as anyone else. That's just the way it is.

Normalcy is a comfort to those confused by SCP-001, and should be provided whenever possible.

We Secure, Contain, and Protect.